Two…

Two: Buried Memories

I apologize if this chapter is confusing. I will tie this part of the story together very soon, so that it all makes better sense. 🙂

Every Thursday Aubrey went to see her psychiatrist. Each time, he asked her to undergo hypnosis. Supposedly, the hypnosis would bring repressed memories to the surface. Aubrey always refused.

But this time was different.

As usual, she sat across from his desk. Anxiety churned from within.

Shit, he’s supposed to be my shrink; which means he should help me feel better. Not feel worse, she thought.

“I really wish you’d give this some thought,” Dr. Paulison said.

“I don’t want to give it some thought. I already remember what happened anyway, I don’t need some drug-induced hypnosis crap.”

“What you think you remember, and what actually occurred could be two different things,” he said.

“I’m not crazy. I know exactly what happened,” she muttered.

“Really?” he asked, condescendingly. Then he leaned forward in his chair.

“Then tell me who fathered your baby,” he said.

Aubrey glared at him.

Go to hell, she thought.

“I’ve already told you who the father is. Now I don’t want to talk about it anymore.”

“Look, depending on the outcome of the hypnosis, your prognosis and diagnosis could change. So why not help me, so I can help you.”

“Yeah,” she grunted. She actually wanted to laugh over his incessant use of ‘osis’ words.

Hypnosis, prognosis, diagnosis.

“For instance, depending on the outcome, your diagnosis may be changed from psychotic. Perhaps you’re just bipolar, or maybe you have PTSD. If nothing else, it would lessen the stigma. I’ll admit it’s a slim chance, but a chance nonetheless.”

“Fine. I’ll do it,” she said. “I’ll take your ‘truth serum’ crap.” She couldn’t believe her own words.

“Finally.” He sighed and almost smiled. “I’ll schedule the hypnosis two weeks from today. I’ll be administering sodium pentathol, which alters cognitive function in the brain—”

“Yeah. I already know that,” she snapped.

Aubrey sat for several more seconds before leaving. Both doctor and patient stared at one another; it was very uncomfortable.

That evening, Aubrey visited her parents’ home. It was a lovely residence that overlooked the ocean.

Indeed, her parents had money, but Aubrey never really felt rich…

Then she remembered why she never liked to visit.

With saline-injected lips warped into a fake grin, her mother greeted her.

“Hi sweetheart,” she oozed with syrupy sweetness.

Aubrey wanted to vomit.

“Where’s Dad?”

“Probably screwing one of the nurses.”

Aubrey fell silent. Her mother was always paranoid about her father screwing around, particularly with one of the hot nurses he worked with. Franklin Cooper had worked at the hospital for twenty years as a surgeon. Miraculously, he didn’t look a day over thirty. Her mother, on the other hand, used regular dosages of Botox and lipo to stay young.

Aubrey never wanted to be like her.

Nancy forced another smile and said, “so how have you been? We’ve really missed you. How’s college?”

Oh, God. No wonder I’m crazy. This is who raised me… this–this freak of nature.

“I think I’m going to go to my old bedroom and get something,” Aubrey said. Then she quickly headed for the stairs.

She gazed around the room. Her eyes fell to her old bed.

…where she conceived her son. She stifled those flashbacks, but then others took its place.

                                                              …

She’d been sedated, just enough to calm down but not enough to feel sleepy. She preferred to be asleep; to be alone with her dreams, and with the dreams of her son.

Instead, she was awake most of the time and forced to deal with her tortured thoughts. Like how much she despised her parents for making her give away her son.

Aubrey spent six months in that hell hole they called a psych unit.

Snapping out of her reverie, Aubrey looked at the patio doors.

…burying more memories.

She stepped over to the bookcase.

She pulled Romeo and Juliet from the shelf. It seemed like every fiber in that room possessed painful memories, including the book.

The following night, Aubrey invited Shawn over. She knew he’d help get her mind off certain things…

Or would he?

                                                           …

His lips caressed hers, as his fingers caressed her thigh.

He pressed against her, nudging her downward.

Panic erupted inside her.

Aubrey shoved him away.

“What are you doing?” he asked, incredulous.

“Nothing. I’m sorry—I’m just afraid.”

“Afraid of what?” he chuckled.

“Of… going too far,” she said, feeling ridiculous.

“It’s not like you’re a virgin or something,” he said. Very insensitively.

Aubrey never told him about giving birth a year ago; never told him about her stint in the nut ward; never mentioned her crazy parents. There were very few things Shawn knew about her, and not being a virgin happened to be one of them. Indeed, he’d no clue she once got pregnant and had a son. She also didn’t plan to tell him anytime soon.

“You’re right. I’m not a virgin,” she muttered with sarcasm.

“Maybe I should leave,” he said.

“No—” she began, but he’d already left the sofa.

Great. Just freakin’ great.

                                                           ****

Hope y’all enjoyed this one. ♥

This story will be updated every Wednesday or Thursday until the EP. Then it will speed up.

As of today, there’s about 55 more days till Late Night. lol. That’s less than 8 weeks. 😛  Yes, I’m obsessed.